\\ S U M M E R F L Y \\

The summer has flown by so quickly, and here I stand in its last day, inhaling august blackberry drifts and the whisper of September-sweet dampness that slides off of the alder leaves along the road. The air is quiet, but pregnant with a secret, one only September will reveal. Rustling murmurs of peace coming, peace that passes what my mind has known.
The majority of my days have been numb, clouded with a sense of guilt-something-I-can't-quite-pinpoint. When I speak, ashes are breathed into the air in front of me, and I look down to see that I am fading, or at least the shadow-person I was. The real B was somewhere in the atmosphere, shining and ever-elusive as I tried to grasp her in vain. I only caught glimpses, and in-between the ashes in my heart called out for redemption. I felt even my hope slip out of my fingers like liquid honey, begging to be eaten but wasted on the gray ground.

I do not claim to be completely healed in my heart. I wonder that I ever thought I was, that is until I meet the Giver-of-breath face-to-face and He gives me the last piece of the silly thing. I do know one thing... 

I woke up with hope today.

It was just... there as I came out of a sweet dream. Freedom was there too, as sure as the joy that spills down like oil over my head, healing my scars and healing my heart. Hope is a person. So is Freedom, as a matter of fact. And He was there, with me.

I have been meditating on what David meant when he said that God was his salvation. How deep does salvation run, really? How far can beauty pierce through the skin of deception and turn a dead thing alive? It's a frightful yet inevitable thing to come to the end of yourself. I pray it comes sooner than later for you, and that it comes often. 

August was the month of being laid bare. September is one of hope. Hope and Freedom. I welcome her with open arms.